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tTO-DAY'S SHORT STORY.J !…

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t TO-DAY'S SHORT STORY.J Teaching Him a Lesson I I I "Thank Heavin. for that!" I had just taken my seat in a "third smoker," and was opening my evening paper, when the above exclamation caused me to look up in suri iriee. The speaker- who when I g'ot in had been hidden behind a stained and crumpled newspaper—was a sallow-faced young man of the "orit-at- elbows" description, and he spoke in a tone of such fervency that I concluded he must have some pressing: appoint anent, and was impatient at the train's st opptage. I was about to ask him if this was so when he | anticipated me. "Pardon my habitation, sir, he said, wip- ing his brow with a coloured handkerchief, "but if you only knew what I've endured t 1.; this last 'arf-hour." Then I smiled, for I remembered that a l' I plump, good-looking young wonan with three small children, each armed with a .1 monster stick of gaudily sGriped "toffee," 1 j had got oat of the carriage at the last elation; indeed, I had givon the young ij I woman a lift with the children, with the result that there were five distinct impres- sions of sticky fingers on my coat-sleeve. j "You don't care for children?" I said. "It wasn't the childer, bless you," my com- panion returned. "It was their mother. I nearly 'ad a fit di'rectly I Maw 'er makin' for the door, an' I'd cnly time to 'ide behind the noospaper, when hin she gets with the kids." The young man paused h re and drew out a short clay pipe. "I used to know 'er, you see, sir," he resumed, helping nimself to my tobacco. In fact. we were sweethea.rcs. Lemme see, i it 11 be eight 'ear ago now. I'd a good job at the time as assistant to a pawnbroker, an' I should ha' been there yet, an' maSlter of the shop-for old Flint's dead-if it 'adn't been for er," and he frowned gloomily. I "She—she treated you badly?" I observed. "N-o, I don't suppose you'd say that. > | What she did, she did simply out of .revenge. f Ah, she 'ad me proper. You set', I was always what you migoat cail a practical chap. I looked after number one, an' on one thing I'd made up my mliid-I meant to marry well. I'd a büd job with the prospect of a rise. I was a smartish young  feller. I could cut most of 'em out with t?; j gals, an' I iw no reason why I shouldn't } marry someone with a bit of prcperty, or even with money in the funds. That was what I meant to do. What I did do was to I get reg'lar gone on 'er d'rectly I set eyes on 'er, which w.a.s one Bank 'Gliday at 1 I Blackpool.. I "It was at the Tower I droppai across 'er. 1 She was standin' in the ball-room—splendid I place that. ain't it?—watchin' the dancers. She took my fancy at once, for she was one i of the plumpish sort, with rosy cheeks and 'J i bright eyes an' such a fringe, right into 'er Ij eyes. an' she was dressed all in white, with a row of pearls round 'er neck. a big 'at I trimmed with red roses, an' yellow sand I shoes. I was no end of a toff nryyelf, for I'd just bought myself a reg'lar flash get-up —white ti-ousers an' a stripped jacket. crim- 1 son and black, an' a new straw 'at. Well I edged neaT 'er, an' after a bit I J; caught 'er eye. Then I smiled, an'—well, t she smiled back. You know the way. Then I went up and raised my 'at, an' a.kd 'er ) if she'd 'ave a turn, an' she said she 'didn't I mind,' an' in another minute we was a a trippin' on the light fantastic. After it was over I took 'er to 'ave a, email lemon. Then we'd ajiother dance, an' after that we went an' sat down to --ool. I asked 'er 'er name, but she only aughed an' said she 'ain't got one. J But I know yours,' ahe aes. J I 'Bet yer don't,' ses I. What is it?' i[ .1 It begin6 with a J- your ChriS'tian It begina with a J— your Christian! name,' skhe Res. 'Your other be,-ins with a Well, I stared then, for she was right, my I ) 3ZMe being Joseph Scarratt. 'Ow did you know it?' I ses. J 'Ow? Well, do you know Miss Hopkins?' 'Very well,' I ses. 'She comes from where [ do.' 'Yes, she ses, 'an' so do I.' Go on,' ses I; you're a kiddin' me.' 0, well, you needn't believe me unless you like,' she ses. t Well, in a bit I found out that it ( was the truth. She worked at Ribbon an' Ohiffoo's, an' the reason I 'a^ln't seen 'er before wa3 that she lived a bit out of the town, an' went by train night an' mornin'. "Well, I met 'er asram the next mo-ruin'. an' I spent the rest of the week with 'er, for 1 was 'avin' my 'oildays at the time. I spent a lot of money on 'er too, one way an' another !■ I bought 'or hice creams a.n,' ohoc'lates, an' I paid for 'er 'avin' 'er fortune told by the 1 gipsies. They sa-id she'd marry a good-look- in' young man with bauburn 'air, an' she, said afterwards it was very funny they gthould say hamburn '«.iI', for my 'air's that colour, as I daresay you'll 'ave noticed." Mr. Soarratt paused a moment here to relight his pipe. and I made a reply that was polite rather tih&n truthful. I think even the longest-'eaded folk lose their 'eads at the seaside," he went on. "I I know I lost mine, for that same afternoon there was a chap on the sands takin' forty- gra;phs. 'E wanted to take us together, said *e'd make the prettiest pictur' 'e'd ever took. ifoe seemed inclined for it, an' ao we went in in' were took 'er a sitting down, me a stand- in' up. A bob it cost me. I thought it was cheap a.t the time, but-well, it was the mad- dest thing I ever did. Of course, before the week was out I'd reg'larly proposed to 'er, an' that although I knew 'er father was only a joiner, an' 'er mother took in sewin'. "Perhaps you'd think as when I got back to the shop an' began work again I should xome to my aenpcf and back out, but not a oit of it. I wae arf orf my dot about 'er, an I ue-ed fairly to look forward to Sunday,, t when I took 'er walks. Very soon I started goin' to the 'ouse to tea. Although they was what you would call in 'umble circumstances, they was very respectable, an' they'd a nice front parler where me an' Polly used to eit on the sofa. "Well, things went on pretty smoothly-like for some time, an' then, one fine mornin,' old Flint surprised me by tellin' me 'e'd a niece a-oomin' to keep 'ouse for 'im, 'is old missis gettin" too old to do much, an' as she'd 'ad a fancy education 'e said she'd be able to give us a 'and with the books, "Well, it wae a bit of a novelty this, to 'ave a lady clerk, but when I told Polly she P-jf f d6dn't arf &eem to like it.  She'll be wantin' to flirt with you arf 'er "? J tim?. I know,' she sea. I'1! 1 ?She'll 'ave to want then,' ses I, an' then, |ff of course, she mad<? me promise not to carry ? on with 'er. Giria is awful jealous one of ?! another. As for me, I ncver thought of nothin' of the sort, for the fact was I'd got it ? mto my 'cad ehe wouldn't be up to much, for old Flint an' 'is missis were not what you ? could call good lookin'.  "'OweveT. as things turned out, I was j|g mistook for once, for though she wasn't any- K ways equal to Polly, yet I've seen far wor- ??? ? tookin' gais. She was big an' tall, with I ?. black eyes-fine eyes they were; an' from the & very first ahe seemed to make 'erself haff- able. Of course I always did the polite to a lady, but I wasn't more than polite, though I could see she was ready enough to take on; an', what is more, it soon struck me that the old Flint 'ad no objection to it, either, for whenever 'e found us chattin' he said nothin'. "I soon found I was right about this, for one day 'e actually asked me if I'd come to tea the followin' Sunday. As luck would 'ave it, Polly couldn't see me that day, as 'er mother an' 'er were goin' to see a haunt who was ill, an' so I said I'd be very pleased. Of course, I didn't tell Polly. i "It was a lot better evenin' than I expected. We'd a rare spread, chicken an' 'am, an' all sorts of cakes an' jams, an' Lao was reg'la.rly toffed up an' looked better than I thought it possible. After tea she played for us, an' she could play, all the latest comic songs, ,i n' I  an' I gave 'em '\Vhen my 'air began to curl.' It fairly knocked 'em, the old chap espe- oially. 'You must come an' sing for us again, Joe,' 'e ses, when I wa,s goin'. 'Me an' the miosis is very fond of a bit of reai good singin', an' Loo will always play your accom- paniments.' "A day or two after that the old man draws me aside very confidential like. 'Joe,' ses 'e, 'that niece of mine is a fine player of the pianny, ain't she?' 'Very fine,' ses I. I 'An' she's a nice girl, too,' see 'he, next. 'Very nice,' ses 1. 'An' 'e'll be a lucky man what gets 'er,' ses e. To this I said nothin', but my 'eart jumped.. for it occurred to me whit 'e was a drivin' at. A day or two after 'e comes to me again. 'J oe,' 'e ses, after a bit, there's some- thin' I want to say to you this afternoon, an' as I'm a plain man I'll say it in plain words. It's this—me an' the missis 'ave took a fancy to you, an' we want you to marry wo.. She's well worth marryin', for when we're gone "he'Jl 'ave all there is. New. if you'll say- yes I'm roady to make the busi- ness over to you, for I'm thinkin' of takin' things* a bit easier, an' you can be married d'rectly. tome, what do you say?' "Well, I could only stammer an' 'um an' aw. Ah, I see I've took you by surprise,' '0 ses, 'so I'll give you a bit to think it over. Let me know by to-m,?rrow mornin' "? t, I'll tell I didn't sleep much that night, I'll ten you. A poor beggar at t\\enty-&ve bob a week dcesn't get such a hoffer every day, an' I shouldn't 'ave hesitated a second if it 'adn't been for Polly. The business was a good one. an' when the old folks peeked out I should drop in for a big lump I knew, for the old chap -'ad money hin\e=ted in more than one concern. I was in two minds, as you might say. I liked Polly the best; but then, when you can get a wife with a bit of 1:11 W4U, I'd always plenty of common sense, an' the next day 1 told the old man i was willin'. And then, bless me, if 'e didn't take me by the arm an' drag me to the parler! "'Loo's 'ore by 'erself.' 'e ses. 'Go in an' settle it at once,' and there was nothin' for it but to do a,s 'e said, an' when I came out of that parler I was engaged to two girls. "Pretty pickle, wasn't it? An' I made up my mind Id lie out of it as soon as I could, for if old Flint got to know I knew 'e'd cut up rough. Well, I soon found this wasn't so easy. In the first place, Loo was one of the jealous sort, an' grew suspicious if I couldn't spend every evenin' with 'er-which was .impos- sible when there was Polly to see. It was a queer game I carried on for a bit. I used to send Polly notes, sayin' I was workin' late, an' OIr Sundays I said I'd to see a huncle who was very bad. "This acted all right for a while, but, of course, there soon came a time when Polly got suspicious, an' one day I gets a note from 'er askin' me to come up on Sunday night. She said she'd somethin' very partic- ular to say to me, an' that if I didn't come she should come for me. Well, I told Loo the story about the uncle who was bad this time, an' I wrote to Polly tellin' 'er I'd be sure to turn up, an' I decided I'd settle the affair one way or another, for I was on quicksilver, as you might say. Polly opened the door an' led the way into the parler. I couldn't 'elp wishin' that ehe 'ad the tin instead of Loo, for when it came to looks Loo-wasn't in it. On this par- ticular night she looked better than ever, an' I couldn't 'elp 'kissin' 'er, though I'd meant not to. 'Owever, the soon etopped me at that. 'Ere, don't be a kissin' me,' she ses. 'I want an explanation, I do. What a,bout this Mists Flint your a mashin'?" 'Who told you I was mashin' 'er?' I ses. 'Oh, come, Joe, that won't do,' she ses. 'I know all about it. You can't deceive me. I srup-pose it's 'er money you're after?' 'Well, Poll,' I ses, 'I'll be plain with you. It is 'er money. You see, I've been thinkin' matters over a bit lately, an' I've come to the conclusion tnat I'm a doin' wrong in askin' you to wait for me, eeein' that I 'aven't no reasonable prospects of gettin' married, an' you can do so much better for yourself. I 'ope you'll see this in a proper light, an' let us part friends.' "I'd found it jolly hard work to say this, I'll tell you, for I was afraid there'd be a scene, but to my surprise she took it better than I thought. 'I don't want to spoil your chances in life, Joe,' she ses, 'only tell me one thing: you don't oare for 'er as you do for me, do you ?' 'Care for 'er as I do for you!' I ses. 'You wouldn't ask that if you could see 'er. 'Er 'air's the colour of carrots, an' &he's as freckled as a butterwoman.' "As I spoke there was a curious noise in the corner behind a screen. 'It's only the cat,' Poll ses. 'She's after a mouse, See, all you letters an' presents; you'd better take 'em with you,' an' &he 'anded me a little parcel ready done up. 'You seem to 'ave known what I was comin' about,' I ees. '1 'ad an idea,' ses she, 'an' there's nothin' like bein' in time. I think you'll find 'em all right. An now I won't keep you any longer.' "Well, to say that 'er coolness staggered me is to p.ut it mildly, but I did my best to carry it off in the same fashion. 'You're a sensible lass, Poll,' I ses, 'an' I'm glad to see you look at this matter in a proper light.' 'It's no use cryin' over spilt malk, > she Ees. ''Ave you got your 'at? I'll let you out,' an' she led the way an' opened the door, just for all the world as if she'd been lettin' out some ordinary visitor instead of the man she loved an' might never see again. As I shook 'audt; I was about to kiss 'er, but she wasn't 'avin' any. can 'ear the oat: she ses; 'I believe she's caught that mouse, an' she slame the door to, an' I walked off, feeling a trifle puzzled, as you may say, for I never imagined Polly 'u'd give me up so coolly.. -owev-er, it was some satisfaction to know I'd settled it. After all, a girl with prospects like boo's was better than a joiner's daughter any day. When I reached the shop next mornin' the old man asked me if I'd step into the parler a minit or two. I fol- lowed 'im, wonderin' what was wrong', an' I wondered more when I found Loo thera with a look on 'er face that made me stare. 'What's to do?' I ses. Well, then she began, an' what she said fair took my breath away. She knew all abouit Polly. In fact, she'd been present at our interview the previous evenin'. When she said that, I stared at 'er like one moon- struck. was there?' I ees. 'Y,' ses she; 'I was the cat. I 'eard everythin', an' thank goodness I did!' I didn't say nothin'. It seemed as if there wasn't nothin' I could say. I just stood an' listened lj.ke one dazed, while they both told me what they thought of me. Of course, I 'ad to clear out at once, an' clear out I did that very day. Next mornin' I 'ad a letter from Polly. She said I'd be glad to 'ear tha.t the cat 'ad caught the mouse. She told me other things, too: ow she'd gone to Leo an' asked 'er to oome an' see 'er, telling 'er she'd open 'er eyes as to my real charac- ter. She also said 'er aunt was dead an' 'ad left 'er five 'undred pound, an' that she thought she'd soon be able to buy a sweet- heart with it. An' so she did, for six months later she married a well-to-do grocer. You won't wonder at my hagita/tion now, I daresay. The sight cf 'er brought it all back, as if it 'a.d been yesterday." The train was stopping now, and I got out, leaving Mr. Scarratt to reflect upon the bitter past.

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